20. Because inevitably some derelict will ask you on the mainland if you have met "DOG"
19. Nearly throwing my arm out of socket while playing dodge ball trying to make twelve year old boys cry all the while getting paid
18. Making twelve year old boys cry
17. Watching a NHL game on live TV in
16. The price of gas (3.75 gal) is not a concern because I only filled up once a month
15. Beach volleyball/Hot tub sesh's
14. I feel cheated because the only celebrity, b-list at best, I saw the whole time I was living on Maui was Sean from "Boy Meets World."
13. I realize I am ATLEAST 600 miles away from wasabi ahi poke'
12. Making fun of sunburned tourists wearing rediculous aloha shirts w/ socks and sandals.
11. Making fun of walking 50 year old case studies that show why excessive and prolonged sun exposure is a bad, bad thing
10. Saying "ho brah'" to address white friends always gets a laugh
9. Annoying the shit out of Phil and Colette with my weak ass, and at times excessive, pidgin. "Ho brah' you like one beef dakine?"
8. Because "piece-of-shit car" isn't nearly as exotic sounding as "Maui Cruza"
7. Trying, and consequently failing miserably, to drop the word "dakine" in conversation without getting called out
6. Small Asian children are funny looking and make me laugh
5. I am "Uncle" to small children here
4. Because I know December through March are going to suck
3. Mac salad doesn't taste near as good anywhere else
2. Drinking beers whilst watching amazing
And the number one reason is ......